How to Build Trust in a Relationship

Whether you’re building it from the beginning or rebuilding after a rupture or betrayal  - there are a few essential components that will help you get there.  

Listen, we are wired to attach and bond from birth-and we do this throughout our life in all relationships and trust develops when are attachment needs are fulfilled and we feel safe. 

Think of the people in your life that you trust the most. Focus on one person in particular, what is it that they do that deepens or holds your trust?

See? You already have a few great ideas.  And now can you make a commitment work through what happened so that the past can be left behind and both of you can forgive or be forgiven? 

Radical Honesty: Trust begins with radical honesty.  How transparent are you? Do you try to protect your partners feelings or fear what consequences would unfold if you were authentic? You may think you’re helping but being upfront and open builds reliability and predictability together. There is security in knowing that no matter what is brought forward, you can work through it together. 

Consistency builds trust. Reliability, stability, consistency-all of these and help generate trust in him and increased emotional safety. When we can predict or expect certain level of behavior from a person, we feel safe I don’t want to draw close to them.

Repair: Hurts, disappointments and sometimes ruptures are part of being in a relationship. If you can talk it through and take responsibility - Sit down and share.  the wounded person must share about their pain.  The other partner needs to acknowledge the impact, express remorse and empathize with their injured sweety. 

And there’s a settling when we hear I’m sorry from the heart - these pieces will help you rebuild the care and faith for a better future. 

Building trust can be as unique as the situation that broke it.  Be open to counseling or mediation if necessary for more guidance and direction.  Wishing you a powerful journey friends.